Sex therapy in Sevenoaks, Tonbridge & Tunbridge Wells, & online

What is psychosexual therapy?

Feeling anxious or embarrassed when talking about sex with your partner is very common. Psychosexual therapy (previously called sex therapy), gives you a safe and open forum for doing this together.

As the body and mind are very closely connected, sexual difficulties are often caused or made worse by psychological factors, such as anxiety or stress.

I am experienced in treating sexual problems, and my training in Psychosexual and Relationship Therapy (MSc) at TR has enabled me to work in an open and reassuring way with a wide variety of sexual problems. I am a member of COSRT (College of Relationship and Sexual Therapy), and ATSAC (Association for the Treatment of Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity).

My approach to psychosexual therapy is to think about what may be going on for you both, and what this means for your sexual relationship

Difficulties that clients bring to me include:

  • Sex feels routine and mechanical
  • One partner wants more sex than the other
  • Awkwardness about how to initiate sex
  • Difficulties in becoming aroused
  • Painful intercourse
  • Difficulties with having an orgasm for men and women
  • Problems with getting or maintaining an erection
  • Fear of sex
  • Difficulties after childbirth
  • Maintaining your sexuality as you get older
  • Body image issues and lack of confidence
  • Sex and illness
  • Compulsive Sexual Behaviour Disorder (out of control sexual behaviour such as watching porn/visiting sex workers)
  • Confusion about your sexuality and gender
  • The effect of past sexual abuse on relationships and sexuality

How does psychosexual therapy work and how does it differ from relationship therapy?

Psychosexual therapy is the same as relationship therapy, but with the added component of talking about sexual issues. We will work with the emotional aspects of your relationship, that could be adding to or maintaining the sexual problem, as well as thinking about the physical side. I will take a sexual history, and then I will tailor a treatment plan for you.

This may involve some tasks such as gentle touching exercises that are done in the privacy of your own home. This is known as the 'Sensate' programme. We will then talk about this in therapy, together with the relationship issues that may be contributing to the problem. Often just talking about these feelings with someone who is sympathetic, may really help. I will plan the exercises to suit you, as a unique couple, or individual, and we always work at a pace you are happy with.

Can I come on my own for psychosexual therapy?

Yes of course. Sometimes, clients like to work on a sexual issue they may have alone, to give them more confidence. There is no need to come with a partner. I work with clients from all sexual orientations, in a partnership, or single. For more information call me on 077721 12039. If I am not available please leave a message, and I will get back to you as soon as I can.

Get in touch

Feel free to contact me if you have any questions about how counselling works, or to arrange an initial appointment. This enables us to discuss the reasons you are thinking of coming to counselling, whether it could be helpful for you and whether I am the right therapist to help.

You can call me on 077721 12039 if you would prefer to leave a message or speak to me first. I am happy to discuss any queries or questions you may have prior to arranging an initial appointment.

I am flexible about appointment times, offering early morning appointments that you could fit around a busy commute, and evening and Saturday morning appointments if you work late, or need to arrange babysitting. Appointments can be held in person, or online via Zoom, Facetime or telephone.